Like Taking Candy From a Baby

Or, How to Estrange Your Granddaughter in One Easy Step

Christmas with the Family was uncharacteristically calm and (dare I say?) pleasant this year. The only points worth mentioning for your amusement were a minor dust-up over the scheduling of events on Christmas Eve, and that Dad ate a stinkbug (he thought it was a peanut). Are we maturing? Finding a rut? Getting along better? Who can tell. But far be it from Rosie to leave her loyal fans without a story, and therefore I offer for you this Tale Of Interest.

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My sister received her Bachelor’s degree on December 11, for which we are obviously quite proud of her, and my father flew out to Colorado to be present as Sister walked the stage and received her diploma. He arrived on Friday and he, Sister, Mom, and my five-year old Niece (henceforth known as “Isabelle” for the purposes of direct referral) went out to dinner at a nice restaurant near his hotel. Dinner went reasonably well, despite some awkwardness from his posturing and boasting, and his efforts to pressure Mom into driving 100+ miles out of her way to drop Sister off at his house for the holidays in order to spare him the “inconvenience” of driving up to BWI (where they were flying in) to collect Sister and Niece himself.

The next day, Sister was at the convention center early to prepare for the ceremony, leaving Dad, Mom, and Niece to occupy themselves in the meantime. While sitting in the stands and waiting for the graduation to get organized, Mom thought out loud, “I wonder if there’s enough time to get some flowers for Isabelle to give to Sister?” On cue, Dad took up the charge: “I’ll do it!” Niece joined him, and off they went into the hallways. Some time later, they returned triumphant: Dad bearing a lovely bouquet of red roses, and Niece proudly bearing her very own single red rose. “She cajoled me into buying it for her,” Dad explained. A very sweet gesture, I think you’ll agree.

The ceremony begins, and in due course, Sister walks the stage, performs the complicated hand-jive that graduation officials insist on to effect the simultaneous handshake/diploma-exchange, and rejoins the family at the ceremony’s end. Isabelle runs over to Sister, and Dad, chest puffed out, marches over with the flowers in hand. Isabelle reaches for the bouquet to give to her mommy, but Dad stops her.

“No, no, Isabelle. Since *I* bought the flowers, *I’m* going to give them to her.”

The End.

The Kitties and Doggies Need Your Help!

Vote for Rolling Dog Ranch!!

Petfinder and The Animal Rescue Site are running a shelter giveaway challenge through December 20 in which participants vote once a day for the shelter of their choice; Petfinder/Rescue will then donate $20,000 to the shelter with the most votes.

Follow the link below to get to the voting site. To locate the organization, enter "Rolling Dog Ranch" in the Shelter Name field, and choose "MT" from the State list, then click Search. The shelter name should appear immediately beneath the Search box, along with a Vote button. Click the button - that's all it takes! No sign-up, no donation required, just a minute of your time.

Voting Site: http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/shelterchallenge.faces?siteId=3

You can vote once a day from each computer in your access, each day through December 20. They're already in the lead, so join me in helping Rolling Dog Ranch to get this much-needed grant!

Rolling Dog Ranch is a non-profit sanctuary that takes in abused and/or disabled dogs, cats, and horses that would otherwise be put down in ordinary shelters, and gives them a chance at a better life. The new residents are blind, deaf, paralyzed, missing limbs, suffering from severe vertigo or spinal defects, but are rescued, given a safe home, and provided with medical treatment.

P.S. If you are able to give, all donations to Rolling Dog Ranch are tax-deductible!

Would You Like Some Hate With That Firewood?

I've been meaning to put up this post for a couple of days now, but the holidays got in the way, as they tend to do this time of year. On Tuesday, Husband and I received a postcard-sized flyer tucked in our door jamb, advertising firewood and tree servicing. I was about to throw it away, as we have neither the space nor the use for firewood, and only two trees, neither of which needs removal, but something caught my eye and I paused to skim it.

What I share with you now is copied verbatim from the flyer, punctuation, capitalization, asides, ampersand abuse, and all. I will withhold the proprietor's name and street address, which he provided, because I am not in the business of inciting riot, or at least the egging of people's houses. I hope you enjoy this piece of fine literature as much as I did.

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SEASONED FIREWOOD FOR SALE!

I SELL A STACK!

6 Feet wide x 3 Feet high & the average length is 16 inches long.

1 Stack cost $130 but, if you buy 2 stacks or more you take $10 off each stack

or

go for the deal of 5 stacksfor $560

or

for the super deal of 6 stacks for $630.

ALL PRICES INCLUDE DELIVERY & (STACKING-> within reason).

Other people have been selling & giving less wood than this for years for the same price. To be honest a stack measures out to 1/5 of a cord. You can get alot more wood if you buy a cord, but most of the time the wood is big & cut anywhere from 4 inch long chunks to pieces as long as 2 feet (mixed) then delivered & dumped & you have to stack it then clean up the mess & then pray it will burn. So it's your choice let me do the work for you or you can. I lose alot of business (Tree & Wood) by being honest, but I'm not gonna change & hope to work for you.

HERE ARE A FEW THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW

1) I'm Not being racist it's just that although the Spanish men (some Americans too) are willing to work cheap they AREN'T professionals. They help someone for a day or 2 and (SOMEHOW) get 10 to 20 years experience (that's what they tell you) anyway. So many have gotten hurt and some killed (I'm not making this up) following that pattern not to mention damaging your personal property. I'd also like to know how the Spanish and people from other countries can come to our country legal or illegal & can get credit, loans, new trucks,cars & equipment & houses or start a business when legal citizens almost have to get investigated by the FBI just to renew their drivers' licenses & are barely getting by?

2) Don't be taken by a fast smooth talking person with (big new trucks and equipment), they don't need. They're just showing off their (toys) to be envied by other tree people as well as creating (unnecessary) expenses that are passed on to you. (FANCY) doesn't mean professional.

3) Most say safety first then want to work up in a tree in high winds and rain. Then there are those that offer percentage discounts, then raise the estimate up so that when you deduct the percent-age the price comes down to what the original price would have been to start with (Unknown to the customer).

4) Doesn't it seem a little strange if someone tells you to get a couple of (written) estimates before they can give you their price? Is it because maybe they don't know how to price the work (amateurish)?, I think so. Also if someone gives you a ridiculously low price <--(I know that's what you want to hear) but, that should be a clue to something is not right.

5) I OFFER YOU 30 YEARS OF PROFESSIONAL, HARDWORKING EXPERIENCE ALL BACKED BY INTELLIGENCE! WORK INCLUDES TOPPING, TRIMMING, COMPLETE TREE REMOVAL, DEADWOODING, UPLIFTING, TRIMMING, THINNING AND STUMP REMOVAL.

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