Wednesday, February 25, 2009

This is Why People Contemplate Suicide

For about two weeks now, with a few blessed breaks (also known as "sleep"), I have had Spice Girls songs cycling through my head.

Let me say that again, in case you skimmed and didn't really get the full effect of the horror.

For two weeks.

I have been suffering through.

An almost endless cycle.

Of the Spice Girls.



The Spice Girls.

THE FREAKING SPICE GIRLS!!!

I didn't even like them when they were popular! And I passionately hate txt-speak, which makes it that much more painful that the primary culprit has been - kid you not - "2 Become 1." Vomit. Occasionally, they have chosen to torment me instead with...shudder... "Spice Up Your Life."

This is the sort of thing that pushes people to jump off of bridges, or walk in front of a bus. Unfortunately for me, the suburbs do not offer much in the way of bridges (overpasses will only leave you mangled) and it would be my luck that the DC Metrobus would manage to swerve out of the way in time to miss me, while taking out that nice humanitarian on the sidewalk.

I would ask that you pity me. But instead - admit it - it's happened to you too. Feel free to join me in my personal hell. It's been a little lonely in here.

Friday, February 13, 2009

It's a Blogthings Extravaganza!!

I have nothing to do today. No revisions, no document prep, nothing. I guess I technically *COULD* start flipping through our template stockpile and determining which were duplicates and/or outdated and/or don't serve a purpose anymore. Then again, I *COULD* also spin around in my chair until I throw up. Besides, the contract is up for rebid and we may not get it, so killing time on that may be a wasted effort, on top of which, it will take me all of one hour to do the whole task, so there's no rush.

I tried killing time on Wikipedia, but even the Random Article link let me down on my interest-engaging mission. So instead, I'm playing around on Blogthings and frankly having too much fun learning arbitrary and meaningless things about myself. As a giver, I feel the need to share all my results. So today, Rosie-fans, I present to you:

!!!THE BLOGTHINGS EXTRAVAGANZA!!!


As a Keyboard Key:



You Are "Tab"



Some people might try to say that you're always spaced out.

You do tend to be a dreamer, but you're also a great multitasker.

You work quickly and efficiently. So it's no problem if you goof off a little while you're working.

And if people want to think you're flaky, that's fine. You're getting more done than they are.





As an Aphrodisiac:


You Are Vanilla



You are incredibly sexy and sensual - yet still sweet and innocent.

You have an exotic, mysterious vibe. You leave people wanting to know more.

You know how to make lovers relax, calm down, and be vulnerable.

You draw people in and make them addicted to you. You're a lot more potent than people think.




In a past life:




You Were a Skunk



You carry yourself with sensuality and a flowing energy.

You have a great reputation, and you follow your own (good) advice.




My Friendship Style is:




Your Friendship Style is Independent



You love your friends, but you don't always need them as much as they need you.

You like to do your own thing. Sometimes this means taking a break from your friends and carving your own path.

As long as your friends give you the space you need, you are happy to be there for them whenever you can.

Your friends lean on you for advice and problem solving. You tend to be "the rock."

You and an Empathetic Friend: Go well together. Your Empathetic Friend understand and accepts you... but may be too needy sometimes.

You and a Gregarious Friend: Get along well, as long as your Gregarious Friend is happy to only see you occasionally.

You and another Independent Friend: Have a love/hate thing going on. When you agree, things are blissful. However, more often than not, you butt heads.

You and a Philosophical Friend: Are somewhat a matter of opposites attract. You're both thinkers, but you think very differently.



As an Office Supply:

You Are a Red Pen

You have an eagle eye for detail, which often means you end up finding mistakes in people's work.

You may seem quick to criticize or correct, but you think accuracy and truth is important.

You like to be involved in every project.
You feel like you put the polishing touch on things.

You would make a good editor, detective, or accountant.

When facts matter, you're the person to call on.




My Communication Style:



You Communicate Honestly



You don't mince words. You are to the point and all about the facts.

However, you are charming enough to tell people the truth yet still not offend them.



It's likely that you have a hilarious, no holds barred sense of humor. And you sure tell an entertaining story!

You're also quite open. People can ask you anything, and you don't shy away from controversial conversation topics.




As an Ice Cream Flavor (you keep your Wayne's World lines to yourselves!):



You Are A Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream Girl



Creative. Expressive. Unique.